Review - Zombie Honeymoon

Well, what can I say about this film that wasn't already said about A Tale of Two Cities...well a lot actually because A Tale of Two Cities is a classic and this movie is an overly dramatic pile of poo. Please understand that I never prejudge a movie on production value or sound or well, anything, I judge on content and this movie is bleeehhhhhhck. Spoilers may follow.

It starts with a happy young punk/hipster couple getting married and going on a romantic month long get away to the lovely....jersey shore...that’s right the jersey shore. Now I was intrigued because Snooki scares the bejesus out of me and I wanted that kind of visceral scare. Unfortunately I was sorely disappointed as no guidos were present in this zombie classic. So over tanned fake Italians aside, Denise and Danny (our newly weds) embark on their new lives. They start this like many young newlyweds do by doing it in the back yard then going surfing. Wellllll as Danny boy is taking a nap a seaweed covered zombie emerges from the water and attacks him....thought it was for a second but still no snookie....as the zombie attacks it vomits blood all over young Danny and causes Danny to go into cardiac arrest. If only this movie would have ended there. Later at the hospital our hero(?) comes miraculously back to life to the delight of his wife and my dismay.

When they get back home and Danny is different, and by different I mean eating people. This is really where the movie swerves into stupid country. Sweet, sweet baby Denise thinks this is icky and odd but still loves her man. This continues as he eats more and more people, and may I add people closer to both of them....but she looooves him so its okay.

You may think by this point this is a comedy but no, no its not. This crap fest is filled with way to many overly dramatic pauses and moments that do not add anything to it. You start to feel like he should eat her dumb ass to put her out of our collective misery. It ends the way you think it will but hope it wont.

I’m not saying to avoid this film, in fact celebrate it with a loved one and point out to them you would put them down like a rabid dog if they ever started eating people.

originally posted by contributor David Winterborne

Review - AAH! Zombies

I will say right outta the box that I really like this movie. It is smart, funny, fresh and made on the cheap. This movie shows that good things can come cheap and easy...in my town that is also true... but not about movies. I wanna give great kudos to director/writer Mathew Kohnen who took an often tired concept like zombie movies and looked at it from a new perspective. Well, now that I have handed out the handies lets get to what its all about.

This film is based on the perspective of the zombie and what life... err.. unlife is like through their eyes. It revolves around a group of friends that eat tainted ice cream and become zombies...but they don't know it. To them they have super powers and everything around them is moving super slow..oh and they are invincible. They do seem to have acquired a taste for brains but that doesn't mean anything right?? I mean they still fall in love want to have fun...like to bowl....you know your average zombie activity.

This is all great except those around them see them as slow moving shambling messes. The military (which happens to be where the chemical came from) doesn't want them around, well... because its their fault. They track them down and the zombie...heroes(?) yeah... heroes...  have to escape. They just want to find a home of their own to leave in relative zombie peace.

I would recommend that any zombie aficionado watch this film if not only to see a fresh spin on a tired genre. I also recommend this to a non horror fan who just wants to see a good fun film that gets it right.

originally posted by contributor David Winterborne